so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
