If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
