i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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