it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
organizing the empties. That sober.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
that is very illegal...i love you.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
