so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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