Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
