And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
