just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
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