Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
