i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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