DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
this hospital has no fireball
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
