I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
