Who did Billy Mays play for?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
