It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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