is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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