Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
3 2 1 whiskey
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Randomize
