Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Randomize
