I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
