Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
