I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
pop tarts are not kleenex
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
