Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I fill condoms, not promises.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
