so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
