I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Randomize
