if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize