Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
