Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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