dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
