is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
