Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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