Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
