I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
