Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Randomize
