i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
we're making bets on your personal life
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
