Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
