Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
