why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
