how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
