So drunk, too bad you don't want this
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
