no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize