I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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