you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
This is the high leading the old right now
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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