i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
so much tequila, so little girl.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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