That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
