Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
