I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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