the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
But theres a keg here and me gusta
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
