How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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