Just cropdusted the office
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Are my feet made of real feet?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
