Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
