They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize
