The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
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